a haiku

.PretendDog.
Postman delivers
snatch mail through letterbox.
Keep him on his toes.

my morning routine

I sit down to my shreaded wheat
drenched in skimmed milk, ice cold.
Morning routine never misses a beat
newspaper turned neatly with a fold,
Smoothing down my 'crazy' work tie
to avoid falling lumps of cereal flakes.
I let out a long, 'so, this is my life' sigh,
on the radiator todays y-fronts bakes.
Hot tea, sloshed down by huge gulps,
mouthfuls of toast, drowning in butter.
Interupted by loud heartburn burps,
opening delivered bills with a mutter.

Posting a Letter

I had to post a letter the other day and I spent a good ten minutes licking this envelope to seal it, it cut my tongue up a treat just trying to get it to stick. It wouldn’t, driving me insane I threw the letter down and I look back down at the letter, it turns out it was one of those self sealing envelopes and I hadn’t seen the sticky strip to remove.